the sun is on my side

sexhaver:

thesockmonkeyrenegade:

gracethelostgirl:

lovewithyous:

carolineflack:

HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY STOP TEXTING YOU

HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY START TEXTING YOU

HOW DO YOU MAKE A GUY

do you ever see a text post and feel really bad for the person who originally made it

on reproductive coercion (tw: domestic violence/intimate partner violence)

So I saw a Planned Parenthood ad about reproductive coercion pop up on my dash, and a lot of the comments underneath it were expressing incredulity or disbelief that something like that really happens or really happens often.

But reproductive coercion is actually really common in abusive relationships. It’s a pattern of deliberate, coercive behavior from an abusive partner designed to control and interfere with a partner’s reproductive and sexual freedom and health.  It’s another strategy used by some abusers to maintain their power and control over their partner. Reproductive coercion usually consists of pregnancy coercion (trying to pressure/force their partner to get pregnant) and/or secretly messing with their partner’s birth control (or outright not allowing them to use birth control).

examples of reproductive coercion can include (but definitely aren’t limited to):

• Verbally pressuring you to get pregnant or not use birth control
• Harming or threatening to harm you if you don’t get pregnant
• Purposefully giving you a sexually transmitted disease or infection
• Forcing you to have sex without birth control
• Trying to make you have a miscarriage
• Hiding, removing, trashing or otherwise sabotaging your birth control (pills, ring, patch, etc)

• Preventing you from getting an abortion, or pressuring or forcing you to get an abortion

• Refusing to withdraw (“pull out”) when that was the agreed upon method of birth control

Resources for info and support:

• The National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800 799-7233 (TTY 1-800 595-4889)
• Teen Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-866 331-9474
• Futures Without Violence: http://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/
• Rape Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN) Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
• Planned Parenthood Sexual Health Hotline: (877) 686-5772 option #3

Some published research I’ve read about it:

Sexual coercion and reproductive health - Lori Heise et al

Reproductive coercion: connecting the dots between partner violence and unintended pregnancy - Elizabeth Miller

Pregnancy coercion, intimate parter violence, and unintended pregnancy - Elizabeth Miller et al

A family planning clinic partner violence intervention to reduce risk associated with reproductive coercion - Elizabeth Miller et al

Power over parity: intimate partner violence and issues of fertility control - Rebekah Gee et al

Reproductive and sexual coercion - The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists 

This is a really gross violation of a person’s bodily autonomy and right to well being. But unfortunately it can be really insidious and sometimes people don’t realize that what’s happening to them is a form of abuse. That’s why awareness and access to resources is so important. 

mochafleur:

Y’all even realize how many Black people are getting abused everyday and don’t even know that it’s some type of abuse because it happens so often and it’s so widespread. And when someone in the Black community points out it’s abuse they get hushed the fuck up about.

get outta here, people can be abused and be strong people. Being abused doesn’t happen because a person is weak and deserves it.

That’s some abuser mentality.

If black men hating black women is an Internet trend than why do you rape 60% of us before we turn 18

(Source: strugglingtobeheard)