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It’s amazing how much my self-perception and confidence has changed in such a short amount of time. Like, just maybe 2 years ago whenever someone would tell me I was pretty/beautiful/cute/whatever, I would say thank you, but I almost always thought they were just saying it to be nice; I never thought I was ugly, but I just didn’t think there was anything particularly interesting or beautiful about me, so of course I wouldn’t believe it when others would tell me so.
Now whenever people compliment me or call me pretty I have to fight the urge to say “omg I know aren’t I?”
Just kidding. I do know that I’m beautiful in my way though, so when people say it to me I just think it’s cool that they see it too.
-Do you want a hug?
-Shave your head. Seriously. And never straighten your hair again. You’re natural hair is gorgeous the way it is, don’t let anyone make you feel like you need to alter it to be pretty.
-get a tumblr, avoid facebook for as long as possible
-stop wanting so hard to become friends with those people (you know who I’m talking about). You’re going to become friends with an awesome group of people you probably weren’t expecting, so just go with it.
-Don’t be afraid to identify as a feminist. Embrace it completely, read lots of feminist literature, discover what zines are, read Bitch Magazine instead of Seventeen, and listen to Bikini Kill. For starters.
-You’re gonna have some pretty bad anxiety soon. It’ll only be really bad for a couple of years, but it’ll never totally go away. Don’t try to talk to mum about it, she means well but she’s just gonna make you feel worse. You know exactly what’s causing it, even if you don’t want to admit it to yourself, and you can make it stop. So, save your 19 year old self some unnecessary head/heartache and just get the issue out of your life and try not to think about it ever again. You’ll sleep a lot better at night.
-You will see X Japan in concert. Look forward to it. Also, bring a sweater with you when you go. You’re not gonna meet Yoshiki and have him fall in love with you and whisk you away to have millions of babies with him. He is gonna buy everyone in line pizza, though.
-You didn’t lose grandma’s gold ring, so don’t tell mum you did cause she’s really gonna freak out. Just clean out underneath the bed and you’ll find it.
-Stop trying to lose weight. You are totally fine the way you are. If you still insist on worrying about it, you’re probably the lightest you’re ever gonna be right now and by the end of your first year of college you’re gonna weigh about 15 lbs more than you do, and you’re gonna be hotter than ever, lady.
-Joining drama club was a good call. It’s gonna be one of the best parts about high school.
-Speaking of which, stop believing that your legs are too fat to wear short skirts/dresses. They aren’t, and dresses look so good on you I can’t believe it took you (me…this is weird) until freshman year of college to figure that out. Ditch the jeans srsly.
-Do NOT let mum convince you to throw away those awesome Steve Madden platforms. Yeah they’re old and the sole of one of them was starting to fall off, but that’s what super glue is for. Seriously, you will regret it soooo bad, those shoes were amazing I STILL CAN’T BELIEVE I THREW THEM OUT
-You’re not getting a car till your 2nd year of college. That doesn’t mean you should get lazy about getting your license but just wait till your 18 and don’t bother paying for drivers ed.
-Stop stretching your lobes so fast, and take better care of them, because stretching to 00g last fall was ridiculous
-You’re gonna end up going to prom (junior and senior) and having an awesome time so stop saying how “stupid” you think it is, it’s obnoxious.
-You’re awkward, and you know it. But you know what, almost everyone around you is probably thinking the same thing about themselves. Don’t worry so much about how you come off to others.
The whole concept of “conceit” is kinda odd to me. If someone is aware of how great a person they are, why shouldn’t they own it? Why is that considered a negative thing? And even if you don’t think they’re a great person and they think they are, that doesn’t matter cause their opinion of themselves is the only one that matters right?
I don’t really know exactly where I’m going with this. It just ran through my head and I wanted to get it down.